Thursday, December 15, 2011

To the friend I will never know

A few weeks ago, I became a Helping Hooker and helped a fellow hooker in need.  As a big fan of Rants from Mommyland, I totally embraced what Kate and Lydia suggested – I sent them my name and told them that in the spirit of the season, I wanted to help a hooker and requested they match me up with one who needs a boost.

For those that know me well, you know that I’m always willing to help a friend. I’m that neighbor where you can borrow a cup of sugar, I don’t mind the kids all at my place, I never mind driving and I’m here if you need to talk. I’m also a reasonably decent person. I donate to charity, I pick up litter, we “adopted a family”, I volunteer at school, I encourage my daughter to give and we carry change around so that she can drop a few coins in cans that need filling.

But this wasn't a friend asking (or someone standing in front me with a nice smile and a bell); there was no tangible benefit for me.  There was something about just doing a good deed simply because I could that appealed to me.  I wasn't looking for kudos, thanks or letter I could give to my accountant. I just  wanted to help someone in a quiet way that caused them no embarrassment - because it's hard to look someone in the eye and say "I need help."  

As I was reading about all these helping hookers, someone said that they Googled the address of their hooker in need and was dismayed because it appeared to be finer than what she would have expected for someone requesting help.u nee  As my fellow helping hooker E pointed out, “I just didn’t want to know that.” We were doing this because we wanted to help and trust that those asking for help truly needed it.

Because deep inside, E and I – along with hundreds of other generous Helping Hookers – wanted to do something nice, something unexpected because even though we face our own challenges – we know we’re lucky and we wanted to pay it forward. Not because we bought our little Whos everything on their list or because we need a tax deductible donation.  We wanted to help friends we don’t know – moms who just want to put a single gift in a stocking so that their little Whos can still believe in the magic of this season.

I have never met the hooker I helped. I’d like to think we’d be friends if we knew each other. But if that were the case, would she really have asked me for help buying her kids gifts – much less taken the gift card had I offered it?  I will never know and I’m okay with that. In fact, I’m better than okay. My heart grows when I think about what I was able to do for a friend I will never know. 

A Hooker Holiday

A hooker in need, a mom in bind
Shouted out “Yes Kate & Lydia - I need help, do you mind?”

The hooker brigade – from near and from wide
Embraced helping hookers with glee and with pride

Quickly we moved, mom hookers know no other way
Filling the mail with envelopes that  all seemed to say

"We’re all hookers together, you are not alone anymore
We get it, we know; we’ve been there before

From my hooker heart to yours; our gifts come with good cheer
Wishing all things Merry and a Happy New Year!"

1 comment:

  1. Love this. The joy is in giving not in being a scrooge. Even if the person lived in a better neighborhood than some else deemed they should, you don't know what's going on behind those doors. That's unfortunate that someone would take that attitude.


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