Saturday, July 9, 2011

A friend of a friend of a friend and so on.....

Seems like every urban legend begins with “A friend of a friend of a friend….(insert some distant relative)…but truth be told, I’ve met some great friends because of another friend.

I met D, perpetrator of the walk of shame previously mentioned, through my Big Susan, T. D moved to town from T’s home state and the party began.  Over the years, we’ve tossed back a few drinks, mocked people, shared the excitement of our first new cars, new babies and new homes.  We have little in common – she’s a crazy ass sports fanatic and well, I don’t really give a shit about most sports.  Despite this, we are never at a loss for words with one another and always welcome a good visit. 

And then there is L, a different one than previously mentioned but no less important.  Another connection through T, L is a fabulous burst of energy, humor and resources. A modern day Nancy Drew with a potty mouth.  L tells it like it is or how it should be.

Some friends became family by connecting with one sibling but touching us all. The family D came into our world when one member was a roommate with my sister. A lifetime later, this family seems like an extension of my brother’s family and family gatherings aren’t the same without them.  There are close friends of my siblings that have been around for so long that a visit to my sisters or brother doesn’t seem complete without catching up with them, too.

P is the sibling of a friend.  I’ve long since lost contact with the friend but P and I have stayed in touch.  We bonded when pregnant at the same time and continue to share parenting angst and recipes. She can squeeze a nickel so hard it turns into a dime. I love her for that.

I’ve become friendly with the siblings of another dear friend, one of whom I remember walking to gymnastics class way back in the day. She had the biggest hair I’ve ever seen and her underpants were always hanging out of her light blue leotard.  The sister of my Big Susan L has become another good friend – better now that she is no longer neither a pest nor “young, supple and 21” as she so kindly reminded us in a card.  Geography prevents face to face chats but I do know that on my next trip back home, I will make a point of visiting with both of them.

There are lots of friends of friends that I see at regular gatherings. We never connect on our own but our mutual friends pull us together again and again.  I’m always glad to see them – well, most of them.  Sometimes, this odd group of friends and friends of friends gets together. There are usually lots of laughs but you can easily see the mini-cliques group together and remain in their comfort zone. It is highly likely we they are mocking others at the table or will on the shared ride home.

Sometimes, the original friend falls by the wayside for any number of reasons but what is left behind is the makings of a friendship. Some of those develop into strong and resilient friendships that stand on their own. Some will forever remain connected to the one who introduced us. And still others stay on the periphery – circling my social group, coming in and out based on the occasion.

Friends have passed along a lot of things – some, like kids clothes, recipes and a juicy bit of gossip are way more welcome than the odd cold or crazy ass chain letter.  But the best thing I’ve ever caught along the way is a new friendship – lasts longer and doesn’t leave me with a chapped nose.

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